5 tips for getting your spouse on board
So how to get your spouse on board with your network marketing dreams?
So far it’s feeling like your choices have been:
a) Work for someone you can’t stand, to have enough money to cover your bills. Or…
b) Quit your job so you’ve got time for your kids…and go under financially.
You’re exhausted, overwhelmed and honestly, pretty snappy because you realize you are feeling TRAPPED.
But a few months ago you saw something you could work on the side which could be the answer to your problems.
A friend of yours is doing it.
She’s making it work.
You felt excited about your future for the first time in years – and you took the plunge and enrolled with a network marketing company.
Your husband, your partner, the father of your children… wasn’t pleased.
And he’s been on your case ever since.
Little criticisms, rolling his eyes at your big ideas. He seems embarrassed and annoyed.
And it’s starting to grate on you.
How can he be so negative? He won’t even open up and LOOK at this business and see what you’re excited about.
Without his support you’re starting to feel you aren’t going to be able to manage this.
What are you going to do?
This is such a common scenario.
Not just in network marketing, but it can happen with any side business a mother sets up.
Butting heads about it, and flaring up at each other in front of the kids is not going to solve anything.
There are hundreds and hundreds of women who have built successful networks around their negative spouse (and that spouse is plenty willing to sincerely admit he was wrong now the money is rolling in and he’s been able to fire his boss).
How can you, like those successful women, handle your negative spouse?
- Understand your husband is probably acting our of FEAR. He’s afraid of the changes you’re making, he’s afraid of this big unknown THING that is your business. It’s a maligned industry because a lot of people do it badly. Try and see his behavior as fear based, not he’s-a-jerk based. It will change how you respond to what he’s doing. Show him you are still on his side – don’t get all angry and defensive. Try and hear him out. Have compassion – he is being annoying and offensive because he doesn’t like the change that’s happening.
- Explain you are committed to this. Be sincere. Let him know you love him, but this is something you have to do for your own sanity. Make light of it – ask him to give you a year of his support, and see if you can prove him wrong. What’s the worst that can happen? He gets to laugh at you and say I told you so. What’s the best that can happen at the end of that year? YOU get to say I told you so, and work out how best to really take your business to the next level now it’s proved it can make steady, even if still modest, income.
- Find examples of successful women who have achieved the kind of goals you have in your company. See if any of them have a negative spouse story! It can be VERY compelling to relay that in a respectful way to your husband. It will get him thinking about what he, and your family, stand to lose if he makes this project difficult for you. An excellent way to do this is to leave magazines with these kind of stories laying about so they will catch his eye. Even general success stories can make compelling reading for a negative spouse.
- Tell him you’d like him to look at your presentation about this company. Ask him to meet your sponsor because you want to hear them answer his questions. Let him know it will help with your own knowledge. It would kill two birds with one stone – helping him know what it’s really about, and fast tracking your training as you hear good, meaty questions being answered. Just as with prospecting, you can’t force your husband to look at this information. You have to respect his decision. But your own commitment, and your willingness to let him come to the table (or not) under his own steam, is a powerful advertisement for the way you do business. It is very attractive (think of a magnet and iron filings).
- Agree on a reward for each member of the family, or the family as a whole, when you reach a specific target. Have you guys always wanted a holiday? That can be a great reward and doesn’t have to cost the earth. Maybe a trip to the movies? Or a meal out for your husband and you – or a weekend away together? Does he need a new car? As you reach them, keep setting these goals, they’re very motivating and make tangible the reason for the sacrifices, the time apart and the tight budget.
I know I said 5, but here’s a bonus extra…make a timetable.
Have clarity about family time and don’t encroach on it. Make time each week to share with your husband and treat it as priceless.
As you build your business around your existing commitments, you’re going to get very busy. Plan for that. Prepare for that.
Having a negative spouse is one of those obstacles that can seem insurmountable as you start out on your network marketing journey.
Remember many hundreds of other women have climbed over this obstacle and achieved their goals.
They fired that crummy boss. And with time, money and personal development on their side, they got back into meaningful relationship with their children, their partners and themselves.
It is absolutely worth it – and YOU can do it.
If you’ve already handled a negative spouse and become successful in your network please leave a comment below and tell readers your experience and your best tip!
See you on the road,